Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it”
Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect.
To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha.
On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious.
I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair…
Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.
The lengths we go for music.
Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.
One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.”
And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:
[reeeeeeally deep breath]
[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]
The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.
In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.”
FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.
This is the best band post
Everyone else go home
Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this
which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,
that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that
Who does that?
This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.
More like Julius Fuckit
Bless this post!
reason not to buy any PRIMA video game guide such as this:
i dunno guys, there MIGHT be something wrong with this picture!
I REMEMBER SEEING THIS IN MY GUIDE. IT’S ONE OF THE FEW GUIDES I HAVE BUT I USED TO LOOK AT IT IN SCHOOL ALL THE TIME HOLY SHIT I FORGOT ABOUT THIS.
In case there was any doubt…
babies are naturally able to swim hello they just spent nine moths in amiotic fluid this is instinctive so no, parent is not shitty, parent is re-enforcing baby’s natural instinctive behaviour.
parent is good for doing this because parent is basically saying “yes the behaviours you were born with are great!”
Yup, if babies are ‘taught’ (allowed) to swim before they are six weeks old, they never lose the instincts they were born with that lets them hold their head above water and hold their breath when they need to. SCIENCE, man.
What’s really cool is, humans are the only primates known to have this instinct at birth. Other ape babies would just freak out and drown. So I don’t think it comes from being in amniotic fluid for 9 months (since it’s not like they have room to actually swim in there). It’s been speculated that humans evolved in the ocean at some point, which is a really cool theory that I recommend checking out.
Also, SWIMMING BABY IS ADORABLE.
How Finn Sees The World
In the latest ep of Adventure Time, we find out that Finn is Red/Green Colorblind. Also known as Deuteranopia, it is most common in males, especially Caucasian males.
Using a Colorblind Simulator (go try more pics yourself!) these are a compilation of how Finn probably sees the Land of Ooh. Especially interesting is that he doesn’t really see how pink Princess Bubblegum is, or how red Flame Princess is!
Also, here’s an example of why Finn probably confused the Emerald for a Ruby:
Kind of easy to confuse the two in a dark cave.